Girls Don’t Count: Women Who Were Too Busy Getting Angry To Make a Difference.
Getting angry is allowing someone to frame you and define what you care about therefore, it leaves no room for you to set your own agenda and take some control.
Once again women in the U.S. are faced with a choice between two men who have spent the last year wooing their vote – sometimes successfully, sometimes not.
However, one thing has been clear – women have, in my opinion, been the subject of much debate but have done nothing to shape the debate. That means, in the end, that it doesn’t matter who we vote for because the really difference is made in what they do after taking office and, in that, we now have no choice.
The problem is two-fold. From the top down, politics is still a boy’s club with some rare exceptions. In fact, despite being ‘developed’ nations, the U.S., together with Canada and the UK actually have some of the lowest numbers of female elected representatives per head when you compare countries internationally.
The second problem is on the grassroots level. We are far too busy being reactively angry at what the candidates say to proactively bring issues to the table. It seems that women are simply content to accept the agenda
A close friend and mentor recently said to me: “No one ever says I’m so glad I got angry”. It might take weeks, months or years but as policy is rolled out across America, policy that affects the world, will we as women be looking back at the conversations we had, the tweets, the status updates and the posts and realize that we were so busy getting angry that we missed an opportunity to shape a nation?
Getting angry is allowing someone else to frame the agenda. It’s reactionary, narrow-minded and usually ineffective. Friends will feel threatened, colleagues will avoid or ignore it, bosses will consider it unprofessional and an angry woman can destroy her husband and commit her children to years and years of expensive therapy.
Not only that, getting angry is allowing someone to frame you and define what you care about. Just because someone tells you that you are ‘disorganized’ or ‘incapable’ doesn’t make you that. Anger leaves no room for you to set your own agenda and take some control.
Women, we missed an opportunity. We were so busy dealing with often irrelevant and insensitive comments that we failed to get commitments on issues that we could really make a different on: equal pay, poverty reduction, further improvements in healthcare, education and foreign policy that could affect our international sisters.
We might not, as women, all cast our votes for the same guy but on one thing we can all agree – unless we set the agenda we will never make the proactive moves that we need to improve our friendships, workplace, families and world.