The Man Plan: How True Love Is Actually Integral To Success
By Chana Goldstein and Monica Sampson
‘A Man Is Not A Plan’… What was a revolutionary idea is now a warning of the past. “Love will hold you back” scream the classics of our feminist movement. Respectfully, I disagree. You don’t have to choose between love and success. True love can drive you forward but you have to have a Man Plan.
1. Who are YOU and what you YOU want?
Your man plan has got to start with an understanding of who you are separate and distinct from what the world, and particularly what you think men, want you to be. Alongside that, you have to know what you want out of life. No one else can invest in your dreams until you know what you are dreaming of.
2. Date SMART and Stay TRUE To Yourself and Be OBJECTIVE
Resist the urge to ‘fall’ in love with boys who pay you attention. It corrodes your power and, worse, contaminates your self-esteem. Instead, when you are ready, seek out a real man who will be a true and equal partner. Ask smart questions and if you don’t like the answers have the strength to move on. Lastly, the longer you hold back on the physicality the longer you can be objective about the relationship. Good relationships create good sex. Good sex does not create good relationships.
3. Be INVESTORS not CONSUMERS
There are two types of couple. There are those who consume each other – they use their partner to get ahead and fill their needs. Then there are those who invest in each other believing that ‘my success is your success and vice versa’. These couples do more than ‘support’ each other, they sponsor each other. We invest in ‘my dreams’ because they are now ‘our dreams’.
Sticking to the man plan isn’t a guarantee but a framework. It will help you differentiate between a man who is ready to help you be the best version of yourself from a man who will hold you back! Feminism is about taking advantage of opportunities and true love is one of the most powerful opportunities you will ever have.